SD
Every day is a fight

Archive for the ‘dreams’ Category

The hug of the badger-panda.

May 18, 2015

Can’t say I’m doing good. There was a better time, but… Things got worse again. Problems with food, taste hallucination, heavy allergy and skin problems, asshole parents. Stress level surprisingly low. Tried two alternative sleeping pills but they caused a massive weight gaining and now I’m back on Z. Have been sleeping better since 2,5 […]

Bread and cheese.

February 16, 2015

Because I’m too lazy to cook. I only have bread and cheese. :P But I’m in control of the money, made pretty good progress this year already. Of course I’m constantly worried about money and not having enough and not being able to pay bills or buy stuff. But I’m not wasting it all in […]

Leaves.

October 10, 2013

How that word can have two meanings. It’s fall here, all trees have all shades of yellow and red and rust leaves, those leaves litter the streets, the air smells fresh and wet, like forest and fields and parks and wet sand. Drops of water fall but they wither away as soon as they started. […]

A day in school

September 9, 2013

Cat alarm went off at 4AM like it does every morning, even weekends. I thought about staying awake right away, but then went back to sleep and moved my own alarm to 5AM, finally getting awake ten past. Crazy horrible stress dreams, one in which I was in that English TV-show where two young women […]

No one nothing is real

July 9, 2013

Nah it’s not only the sleep deprivation. I just feel horrible. Nothing makes sense. This is the second day. Been listening to music in incredible amounts, playing a bit, posting shit in Facebook, watching porn. Well, mostly just watching porn. Mostly Tumblr. 90%. The rest that stuff I already have saved. Manga, pics… I can […]

I’m tired to fight

March 3, 2013

This a pic I drew sometimes around new year or Xmas. I’m fighting, still, but I’m tired. I can’t talk to anyone. If I talk to my therapist I get reported to police, I got no friends, no-one cares and I don’t care about them either. It’s so cold here, and inside of me. Hard […]

Vibrating waves of pale darkness

February 16, 2013

Ikatan Nuain, Ikatan Nuain, your voice is the harp of the sea. In the floods of darkness there is light where you go. Ikatan Nuain, Ikatan Nuain, your name is seagras’ whispering. Shining corals glory your name there where you go. Ikatan Nuain, Ikatan Nuain, your skin is pearls’ freshness. On the riffs shells open […]

…still there are changes

December 16, 2012

A good album from far behind in time. I discovered it the time I moved out of home and it marks as well a period in my life as my experience of “true love”, grief, deep pain and loss greater than anything yet. My body’s hurting, it was a long day. Partly fun, mostly tiring. […]

Today’s been a better day

December 9, 2012

I slept til 3pm after drinking 4 long drinks yesterday evening. Not really enough to make anyone drunk. But it relaxed my body and my back ain’t hurting so much anymore. Maru kept me awake at night, that’s why I slept so long. I moved my only LifeFic blog left to WordPress, see the link […]

I’ll do anything to nurture and protect you my love…

July 28, 2012

Yup. I actually did it. I didn’t have the time and because of that I was too late to buy me new pants (damn me for that), BUT I got new information, a nice chat and was in heaven for those 30 mins. Candyshop visit. ^^ Still on my way home after midnight I was […]